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cit

Вы думаете что примитивным народностям чужда метафизика? Я слышал диалог: "Я твое все ебал!"- "А я твой мир ебал!". Универсум, ебта.

cit

Раньше пытались пережить ледяную зиму, теперь надеяться пережить удушливое лето. Россия — все для людей.

A man is in a hot air balloon and he realizes he is lost. He spots a man in the field below him and calls down:

"Excuse me, can you help? I promised a friend I'd be somewhere half an hour ago but I'm completely lost. Can you tell me where I am?"

The man replies:
"You are about 30 feet above this field, you are between 40 and 42 degrees N. latitude, and between 58 and 60 W. longitude"

"You must be an engineer" says the balloonist.

"I am!" says the man, "How did you know?"

The balloonist laughs, "well, everything you've told me is correct, but I don't understand what you are talking about and I'm still lost"

"Ah, you're a manager" says the engineer

"Indeed I am!" replies the balloonist, "How could you possibly know that?"

"Well..." says the engineer, "you don't know where you are and you don't know where you are going. You've made a promise you can't keep and you expect me to solve your problem. You are in exactly the same position as you were before we met, except now somehow it's my fault!"

Загадайте целое число. Умножьте его на 418 и извлеките корень из его натурального логарифма. Поздравляю, у вас получилось хер знает что! (с) twitter.com

"И видех, и се, трактор сран, и седяй на нем имеяше стул и крышку от кастрюли, и дан бысть ему венец: и изыде из сраной Рашки, и да изыдет." (c)

Плюсы как они есть, т.е. --- хрен поймешь...
/usr/lib/gcc/i686-pc-linux-gnu/4.5.2/../../../../include/c++/4.5.2/ostream:579:5: ошибка: initializing argument 1 of ‘std::basic_ostream<_CharT, _Traits>& std::operator<<(std::basic_ostream<_CharT, _Traits>&&, const _Tp&) [with _CharT = char, _Traits = std::char_traits<char>, _Tp = conky::range_config_setting<double>]’